iam happy as i finally could cry

for the past 4 or 5 months iam kinda regular on my prayers alhamdolilah,, but iam not having this feeling of being in areal connection with ALLAH,, i just practise praying,, but not enjoying nor feeling the change in me, ,myself and my mood the prayer should always make.

for some reason i dont know i have been missing feeling that iam with ALLAH,i canot reach this state , may be because of the tension of the exams,may be my faith is not that firm the way it should be,,may be .. and for the past few days in my holidays no much is changed,, just praying,, but i used to make much readings and searches whether from the scientific or spiritual side of our religion through many websites,, i was amazed with things i for the first time find out in the holy quran,,and our religion in general,, many things made me amazed,,one of them was that search done to illustrate just the numerical miracles in surat alfateha."some of them,, written below on the blog",

itis brilliant search ,,i just felt comfortable and proud when iread,,and said thanks to ALLAH i was born muslim,, after that i kept praying abit more on time,, but still not what iam looking for,,

then it was yesterday,,while i was changing the tv channels and stopped me on almajd tv channel ,, avery beautiful voice , sheekh saad alghamdi ,, and stopped me more the verses of surat AL EMRAN 26,,27,,, and then i was to find aflow of tears on my cheeks ,,and said to myself while feeling so comfortable ,,yes,,alhamdolilah,, thatis what i was wishing,, and then i felt that i fear ALLAH so much,, i dont know,i just wish i will continue have that feeling and life business with temptations doesnot take away me again, and i beg ALLAH ,,that even though it took me,,i will be back soon to the straight path. here are the verses.

قُلِ اللَّهُمَّ مَالِكَ الْمُلْكِ تُؤْتِي الْمُلْكَ مَن تَشَاء وَتَنزِعُ الْمُلْكَ مِمَّن تَشَاء وَتُعِزُّ مَن تَشَاء وَتُذِلُّ مَنتَشَاء بِيَدِكَ الْخَيْرُ إِنَّكَ عَلَىَ كُلِّ شَيْءٍ قَدِيرٌ { }26

تُولِجُ اللَّيْلَ فِي الْنَّهَارِ وَتُولِجُ النَّهَارَ فِي اللَّيْلِ وَتُخْرِجُ الْحَيَّ مِنَ الْمَيِّتِ وَتُخْرِجُ الَمَيَّتَ مِنَ

}2الْحَيِّ وَتَرْزُقُ مَن تَشَاء بِغَيْرِ حِسَابٍ {7

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3:26] Say: O Allah, Master of the Kingdom! Thou givest the kingdom to whomsoever Thou pleasest and takest away the kingdom from whomsoever Thou pleasest, and Thou exaltest whom Thou pleasest and abasest whom Thou pleasest in Thine hand is the good; surety, Thou hast power over all things.

3:27] Thou makest the night to pass into the day and Thou makest the day to pass into the night, and Thou bringest forth the living from the dead and Thou bringest forth the dead from the living, and Thou givest sustenance to whom Thou pleasest without measure.

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يارب نفسى اكون نفسى مش حد تانى

يا رب خلينى برحمتك انسان قلبو بطاعتك ومحبتك مليان

واكون للخير دليل واكون له كمان عنوان والاقينى رايح بلبى الندا ساعة الادان

احمد حسام الدين""